Holding it All Together

by Carolyn Abele, MS, LPC

In therapy spaces, we talk about “holding it all together” as thought it’s a fixed state—calm, regulated, and ideally achievable daily.  But in real life (and work), holding it all together usually looks a bit different.  Some days flow like graceful ballet.  Other days, it looks like 4 cups of coffee, several password resets and lots of “it’s fine” thoughts running wild.  

Holding it all together looks like showing up for family, co-workers, clients and friends.  All while you tick tasks off your to-do list with timely precision.  “No sweat!”  It looks like being present, attuned, and thoughtful—even on days when energy is low and the calendar is full.

Holding it all together doesn’t mean feeling perfectly regulated at all times.  It means noticing when things feel stretched and responding with skill, care and flexibility.  It’s showing up when you want to roll on the floor and have a good old-fashioned tantrum.  It’s knowing which parts of your life are stable enough to lean on while others wobble.

Today could feel like a delicate balancing act held together by duct tape and prayers, yet, you are not failing.  You are functioning.  You are adapting.  You are holding it all together, and getting things done. 

Consider a gentle self-care pause.  Take a second between tasks and check in with yourself:

• What feels most “held together” right now?
• What feels like it could use some support?
• What is one small, realistic thing you could offer yourself today—something that fits within this specific day?

No fixing required, just noticing the positive.

So, if this week feels full, heavy, chaotic, held together with extra effort, know that this is not a failure.  Tomorrow you may be able to hold it all together, with a little less duct tape.

Carolyn Abele, MS, LPC works individually with adolescents through adults.  She specializes in working with individuals with anxiety and depression, trauma, self-esteem, as well as helping adolescents and their families with behavior related challenges. To connect with Carolyn, please visit her website at carolynabeletherapy.com.

Love Beyond Romance

by Allison Beer, MSW, LCSW

“We need friends who wince along with our pain, who tolerate our gloom, and who allow us to be weak for a while when we’re finding our feet again.” - Katherine May, Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times

February brings Valentine’s Day—a holiday known for candlelit dinners, heart-shaped chocolates, and grand romantic gestures. It often places romantic partnership at the center of our understanding of love. Yet many of us are shaped just as profoundly by friendship: the people bear witness to our lives and help us become more fully ourselves.

We often carry parts of ourselves that learned early on that being chosen romantically equals safety or worth. Those parts of ourselves can feel uneasy when romance is absent or strained. Other parts know the steady nourishment of friendship: relationships where we can relax, be honest, and grow together through shared time, laughter, and even hard conversations. Friendship isn’t passive—it’s an intentional practice of care.

In a world where many of us are glued to our devices and constantly juggling work, errands, parenting, school, romantic relationships, and more, it can be difficult to make time for friendship. Yet there is something deeply meaningful about sitting down face-to-face with our friends. Instead of relying on texts, let’s carve out space for in-person connection. Being together in real time—walking, talking, and sharing physical space—creates a sense of belonging and emotional regulation that digital connection can’t fully replicate.

This Valentine’s Day, consider widening the circle of celebration. Reach out to someone you are friends with. Invite them for coffee, a meal, or a walk. Let friendship count as love.

Allison Beer, MSW, LCSW, is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker who specializes in helping teens and adults struggling with anxiety and burnout to find deep healing and relief. She also helps people experiencing challenges stemming from being neurodivergent (autistic, adhd, AuDHD, etc) in this neurotypical world. Her approach combines Internal Family Systems (IFS), also known as parts work, and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), along with mindfulness practices. She is affirming of LGBTQIA+ and Neurodivergent identities. Allie can be reached through her website.

Like a River

by Lindsay Roznowski, LPC

This past year, I read John O’Donohue’s poem “Fluent” for the first time, and it hit me right in the chest—simple, poignant, and beautiful. It goes like this:

I would love to live

Like a river flows,

Carried by the surprise

Of its own unfolding. 

These words spoke to me for a number of different reasons—the nature-inspired aspirations; the themes of fluidity, change, and personal growth; the release of control and the acceptance of what is; the focus on curiosity and surprise, and the wild loyalty to remain present in each sacred moment. The natural world has such gifts to offer.

With the beginning of 2026 upon us, I reflected on how this poem — and the image of the river — can be a reminder and guide for how I move through the next twelve months. Many of us have created goals or resolutions for the new year, informed by how we thought 2025 went. So how can I be more like a river? Adult life can get us tangled up — so many concerns take us out of the moment and into our heads. Whether it be work, paying bills, health issues, or navigating relationships, the mental gymnastics of trying to decode “what to do” can keep us in our heads, searching for some sense of control. In Brene Brown’s book, Atlas of the Heart, she posits that when we feel like things are uncertain or too much, we go to the following places in our heads: stress, overwhelm, anxiety, worry, avoidance, dread, and fear. Being in our heads excessively — and flooded with these intense emotions — can rob us of the present moment. When we allow these thoughts and fears to dominate our energy, our thoughts can become quite toxic and create disconnection with ourselves and our loved ones. 

Consider the image of a river. Even when leaves, branches, and debris drop into it, it doesn’t stagnate but instead continues to flow. It doesn’t wonder why the leaves are there or what to do with them. It continues to be a river, to flow, to move downhill, around bends, towards the ocean. 

So as we break out our new 2026 calendars, let’s ask ourselves: “How can I be more like a river?” Here are some additional thoughts for reflection as you begin the year: 

• How can I allow myself more flow?
• How can I use movement and breath to become more present in each moment?
• How can I more intentionally welcome the unexpected turns of life’s new moments?
• How can I embrace changes as a process of evolution and do the good work to get unstuck from old patterns? 
• How can I release some control and attachment to what I think my path should look like and embrace the beauty of what it actually is? 

Wishing you happiness, presence, and flow in 2026.

Lindsay Roznowski, LPC, specializes in supporting children, teens, and adults in navigating life stressors, finding ease from anxiety, and tapping into their strengths and innate resilience. She integrates mindfulness-based cognitive therapy, positive psychology, nature-informed therapy, and a yoga training background to co-create conditions for optimal healing and well-being. She offers walk-and-talk therapy sessions in the outdoors to those interested. Starting in Spring 2026, she’ll also be offering seasonal nature-inspired therapeutic workshops — so stay tuned! To learn more, see her website at bloomwellnesscounseling.com and contact her at lindsay@bloomwellnesscounseling.com or 215-326-9665. 

Quiet and Candlelight at the Year’s End

by Elizabeth Venart, M.Ed., NCC, LPC

These final weeks before the winter solstice are the darkest of the year. There is beauty in the contrast of the long night with the twinkling of outdoor lights and candle lighting rituals of this time. As you light candles, burn logs in a fireplace, or enjoy the soft glow of a Christmas tree, you have an opportunity to slow down and experience the comfort of the softer light. Sitting in the quiet allows you to honor the natural rhythm of the winter season. In as little as three minutes of intentional, quiet contemplation, you can experience greater calm. 

In Celtic Spirituality and faith traditions around the world, candles have been used in ceremonies and celebrations. The soft glow of candlelight supports quiet reflection, gently guiding us to slow down, to remember, to connect with the Divine, and to honor the light within.

When you light a candle with intention, you are invited to attune to the present moment with a softness, a kind inward gaze. As you tune in to your breath and focus on the flame, time slows down. Your thoughts and heart rate often slow as you relax your focus and gently gaze on a candle flame. This intentional pause welcomes a deeper calm and clarity. 

After a candle gazing meditation, you may find it helpful to close your eyes and sit quietly. You may also find it helpful to journal and reflect. You can write down whatever feels most meaningful in that moment. 

When you move quickly through this transitional time, busy with activities and to-do-lists, you may forget the gifts inherent in quiet reflection. But you carry thoughts and feelings about the year you’re leaving and the one on the horizon. When you pause, you can consider what has been meaningful about this year and what you’re ready to release. You can also reflect on the experiences this year that shaped you — and how you have changed. Finally, you can invite forward some wonder and curiosity: What positive changes do you wish to invite in the new year?

The questions embedded within Mary Oliver’s poem Gratitude offer natural writing prompts for your end of year reflections. Following the title of her poem — Gratitude — the questions focus on beauty and the gifts of being alive. They include: 

What did you notice?
What did you hear?
When did you admire?
What astonished you?
What would you like to see again?
What was most tender?
What was most wonderful?

May you make some time for quiet candlelight, star gazing, and enjoying the beautiful darkness of the longer nights ahead. A variety of books, meditations, articles, videos, and poems are offered in this newsletter for you to explore. May you find peace and nourishment in this season of winter.

Elizabeth Venart, M.Ed., NCC, LPC, is the founder and director of the Resiliency Center. Her individual counseling practice specializes in supporting highly sensitive people, including therapists and other professional helpers, to trust themselves and thrive. An Approved Consultant in both EMDR and IFS therapy models, Elizabeth offers individual and group consultation and is a trainer of IFS-Informed EMDR Therapy through Syzygy Institute. To learn more about Elizabeth’s practice, see her website.

On Pet Loss

by Vanessa Mortillo

“There is hardly time to love a dog as you’d like, as the dog would no doubt like.” — Robert Dessaix

Yesterday as I frantically prepared for work I was frustrated to notice that I was covered in dog hair. As I grabbed the lint roller, a pang of melancholy hit me. Since I had lost my dear, faithful beloved dog, Danygirl, these pesky dog hairs on my clothes are the last remnants of her. I never thought I would be so sad to not be covered in dog hair. 

This moment is one of the many moments that pet owners experience as they process the loss of a pet. It is not only the loss of a loved one, but the moments through your daily routine that were shaped by your time with your pet. Losing a pet is similar to grieving any loved one, and yet it is not the same. While almost everyone in my community has treated my loss very seriously, many people are told that their soul animal was “just an animal.”  In my journeys online, looking for comfort for my grief over my dog, I saw so many posts and messages of people admitting that the loss of their pet was harder than certain loved ones in their life. While every pet is different, pets provide unconditional, uncomplicated support. For many of us humans, our time with our pet is the only time we experience this. This love is much much simpler and more profound. This is why pet loss is devastating.

Another factor complicating grief over our pets is that we take on the difficult decision to offer the mercy of euthanasia. I had an intense mix of feelings about this. It felt uncomfortable to ostensibly play god by choosing to end my dog’s life. However, despite my awareness that losing her would be hard to bear, it was even more unbearable to watch her struggling and not feeling well. The decision is difficult, and many factors complicate each pet owner’s decision. 

And then, there is the time after the loss. This is the work of grief.  Below are just a few suggestions for how to manage grief surrounding the loss of a pet. 

Feel your feelings

Remember that your beloved pet was a family member, and that your grief and devastation are human responses to losing a family member. Write love letters, poems and journal entries for your pet. Visit the places you went to. Do anything you can think of to honor your pet.

Trust your gut

If you feel like your pet is present with you in spirit, allow that to be true. If you feel that you need to hang on to the pet’s personal belongings, do that. There is not a wrong way to grieve.

Memorialize your pet

Memorials are important rituals that help us process our grief and reflect on the beautiful and important parts of our relationships. You can create an altar, have a memorial service, plan to scatter ashes in a favorite place, hang a paw print — anything that will honor the relationship you had with your pet. 

Consider a Pet Loss Support Group

If you are grieving the loss of a pet, you are in good company. A group can offer a community of people who are willing to listen and support each other through this vulnerable time. See resources below for pet loss support. 

Reach out to a therapist

For many, the feelings of loss of a pet are so profound that they experience complicated grief. If you are struggling to manage, have noticed depression or a decline in your mental health, please reach out for support. 

Vanessa Mortillo, LPC, is a Licensed Professional Counselor specializing in play therapy, mindfulness, and expressive arts. She provides a playful space to harness creativity and imagination in the service of growth and healing. She can be reached at 267-507-5793 or vanessamortillolpc@counselingsecure.com.

The Connection between financial health and mental health

by Carolyn Abele, MS, LPC

“Money can’t buy happiness” is a widely used phrase.  One that should also include, “and it can sure cause a lot of stress”.  Money isn’t just about numbers in a bank account—it is also about peace of mind.  Financial stress has a way of spilling over into every aspect of life.  Sleepless nights, irritability, that “pit in your stomach” feeling when a credit card or medical bill arrive — all signs that your brain and wallet are more connected that we’d like to think.  

Money messes with your mind.  Between bills, budgets, Amazon purchases, and retail therapy, it can feel like finances are running the show and controlling emotions. Chronic financial stress can increase anxiety, depression, and even physical symptoms like headaches or increased blood pressure.  Brains can go into “survival mode’, making it harder to focus, plan or make calm, rational decisions.  

Here are some tips that can help:

1. Take small steps- Even something small like starting to track expenses for the week or month can make the unknown more manageable.  Looking at patterns, spending, and amounts can be eye opening and lead to better choices.
2. Make expense check ins a habit and form of self-care.  Create a scheduled time to review finances in a relaxed environment and go into it with a positive mindset.  Maybe its next to the fireplace, or with your beloved morning coffee.  Nothing can be that scary when paired with relaxation.
3. Use tools such as an App (Mint, Rocket Money, YNAB- You Need a Budget) or good old-fashioned spreadsheet to help you organize.  Seeing where the money is going can help reduce spending.

Financial health is mental health.  It is helpful to shift the mindset to include budgeting as a form of self-care that is as important as meditation and meal-prepping.  Seeing budgeting as helpful, such as thinking, “Do I want this, OR do I want to not cry when my credit card bill comes” can be surprisingly effective in decreasing spending.  It is also important to remember, you are not your net worth.  Your value isn’t tied to a number.  Take a deep breath, don’t be scared or avoidant of your limits. And,  remember that money is a tool, not a monster under your bed you can hide from.

Carolyn Abele, MS, LPC works individually with adolescents through adults, and  with  families and parents.  She specializes in working with individuals with anxiety and depression, trauma, self-esteem, as well as helping adolescents and their families with behavior related challenges. To connect with Carolyn, please call 215-354-7941 or visit her website at carolynabeletherapy.com.

Fresh Fall: A Season for Letting Go

by Therese Daniels, LPC, CNIT

Ever since my children have been school aged, we’ve started using the term “Fresh Fall.” As far as I am concerned, the school year calendar holds a lot more meaning and determines a lot more of my life’s direction than the general year calendar. So not only does the air feel more fresh and crisp, for us it is a time for new routines, new haircuts, new clothes, new activities, new workout plans, and new eating habits. Things return to a steadier flow, settling from the wild, sweet freedom of summer. 

In my experience, the beginning of new things usually means the release of something old. As the seasons shift and the air turns crisp, autumn reminds us of the beauty of letting go. A belief I hold close to my heart, one that guides me through the waves of the year, is that we are meant to follow nature’s lead through the seasons. Just as the trees release their leaves, we, too, can use this season of fall, to release what no longer serves us. This may include old habits, toxic situations, lingering worries, or heavy emotions. The falling leaves are not a sign of loss but of nature’s pure wisdom. Nature is preparing for rest, renewal, and the eventual bloom of new growth. In this way, Fall becomes a gentle teacher showing us that release is not an ending, but an important step toward healing and transformation.

A “Fresh Fall” means more than a change in weather—it’s an opportunity to embrace clarity and space in our own lives. By letting go of what is weighing us down, we create room for new beginnings, fresh perspectives, and deeper peace. Much like nature makes way for the quiet stillness of winter and the new life of spring, we can welcome change with open hands and open hearts. This season invites us to trust the process, honor the beauty of release, and look forward to what’s waiting to take root in us.

Therese Daniels is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Certified Nature-Informed Therapist providing individual, couples, family, and group counseling in both indoor and outdoor settings. She earned her Bachelor’s degree at Villanova University and her Master’s Degree in Counseling Psychology at Immaculata University. She began her experience in mental health as a college intern and has been in the field ever since. While her early experience centered around supporting children, adolescents, and families, her experience over the past decade has expanded to include adults and couples. Her emphasis today is on nature-based, mindfulness practices with clients of all ages. Drawing from Nature Therapy, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), Mindfulness-based Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and Solution-Focused Therapy, she supports people with anxiety and depression as well as those navigating life transitions, developing coping skills, and looking to strengthen their self esteem. She facilitates growth and healing by integrating tools from energy work, body movement, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), and creative arts expression. She works collaboratively with clients to create treatment goals and discover methods that best meet their needs. To learn more, see her website at https://www.theresedanielscounseling.com/ or call her at 410-919-9673.