Spring Cleaning and the Meaning of Our Things

by Vanessa Mortillo

I recently went on a decluttering tour of my home office and bedroom. I got sick of the disorganized items piling up, even though my home is usually some version of slightly chaotic. I was pleasantly surprised by a sense of mental spaciousness I achieved by simply removing a chunk of the items. I armed myself with several books about minimalism: the practice of prioritizing what is most important in life, and letting go of the rest. 

I got to thinking about the meaning of my things as I went through different sections of my belongings. I started with clothing. When I removed old things from the closet I felt a sense that I could create a new me. I then tackled a series of jewelry boxes that were left to me by my grandmother. Sentimental items like these are tricky– I felt a sense of obligation to my grandmother to be a good steward of her things. Ultimately, I realized that my grandmother passed these to me because she knew that I would know the right thing to do with them. I saved some of the beads of cheaper pieces that didn’t suit me, so I could upcycle and and make into new items. I discovered some pieces I love to put into regular rotation. I kept a box of iconic pieces that, even if they aren’t my style, remind me of her. I took some of my books off the shelf, and filed and organized the pile of papers on my desk. Suddenly I felt energized. I kept what was truly meaningful from these items and passed on the rest.

The thing that truly shocked me is that the benefits of slimming down my belongings filled me with a sense of potentiality. I now had room to change my style, dream big, and finally tackle some of my loftier aspirations. I realized that at some point, our things can become baggage we carry around, clogging our visual field. Getting rid of things was like shuffling off an old exoskeleton. When I completed the first phase, I felt a sense of clarity and mental spaciousness. I felt like I had room to think and breathe.

To preserve this sense of peace and calm, I realized I need to shift to a minimalist lifestyle. Minimalism isn’t simply the removal of objects; instead, it is an intentional practice of maintaining our space, reprioritizing what to spend our money on, and letting go of anything that doesn’t work for us. As an added bonus, my home will now have less to dust and clean now that surfaces are more clear. 

All our items — even the junk in the junk drawer — carry some meaning. We may have a desire not to waste, a sense of obligation to a person or money the money we previously spent, or another reason we hold on to things. Because of this, minimalism is much harder than it looks. As I continue my journey, I discovered so many resources on minimalism — because this topic is so complicated! The path is different for each person, and it is different in different phases of life. I have compiled some of my favorite resources below. Happy Spring Cleaning!

Vanessa Mortillo MA, LPC is a Licensed Professional Counselor that provides wellness offerings and individual and group therapy. Utilizing mindfulness, expressive arts, and play therapy modalities, she harnesses creativity and imagination in the service of growth and healing. To learn more, contact her at vanessamortilloepcs@gmail.com or 267-507-2793.

Winter Solstice — and a Candlelight Meditation for Peace

by Elizabeth Venart

Winter solstice, the shortest day of the year and first official day of winter, is on December 21st. This marks the gradual return of longer days, peaking with summer solstice on June 21st. Ancient Celts believed that the sun god, Lugh, left every winter and took the warmth with him. They practiced rituals at winter solstice to invite him back the sun, light, and warmth. These included building bonfires and placing candles in evergreen trees. Many of these rituals continue into the present. There is something cozy and magical about sitting near a crackling fireplace, being outdoors around a fire pit with a mug of hot chocolate, or cuddling under a blanket in the soft glow of candlelight. 

In Celtic Spirituality, the softer glow of sunrise, sunset, and candlelight are optimal times for quiet contemplation. We are invited to turn our gaze inward, pause from the busy pace of our lives, and simply reflect. The gentle glow of candlelight gives us an opportunity to slow down and invite forward the quieter parts of ourselves, parts that may get overshadowed in the noise of the everyday. Listening and attending to ourselves in this way can cultivate greater clarity and inner peace. 

During the darkness of the months ahead, you may want to experiment with creating space daily or weekly for meditative reflection. You may choose sunrise or sunset as a time of gentle light and contemplation. Watching the sun rise in the morning or set in the evening reminds us of our existence on planet earth, our presence in the natural world. Simply watch the light come, watch the light fade, notice the colors and details, the fading away of details to darkness. 

You could also practice a candlelight meditation. Simply light a candle or sit outside by a fire and gaze upon the flame. Focus on your breathing, and see if it becomes possible to slow your thinking and tune in more consciously to your five senses. Notice the candle or fire, any breeze or sounds if you are outside, the temperature of the air. As you inhale, feel the temperature and sensation of the air entering your nose, then the flow of exhale. Notice the rise and fall of your chest and belly as you breathe in and out. All the while, keep noticing the candlelight or fire. If thoughts arise, simply notice them and then return your focus to your breath and the gentle light. 

If you find it difficult to take this pause in your day, nagged by a sense of urgency for things you need to do, perhaps set a timer for five or ten minutes. Knowing you will only be sitting quietly for a short while often allows our thoughts to settle. 

Taking this pause to sit quietly in gentle light, breathing and being present, cultivates peace and a sense of inner spaciousness. From that place, it becomes possible to reflect on bigger questions, decisions, and next steps. So give yourself the gift of darkness, the gift of gentle light, the gift of self-compassion. When we nurture our inner light in this way, it grows — and that radiance, like the sun, brings more light to our world. 

Living with peace during COVID - by Dean Solon

For what are you most grateful as you look back over the year and why? I am most grateful to have awakened each morning to be breathing, to be alive, and to hope and pray that all those who are near and dear to me are breathing, alive, today

 

What did you take for granted this year? Much of the time, I was taking nothing for granted during this past year.

 

What did this reveal to you about yourself and your presence in the world? It is indeed a challenge to be peaceful and compassionate in the midst of chaos and commotion. 

 

Was there an unexpected joy that you experienced during this time?  The great opportunity of being at the shore sometimes, and with the great joy of the ocean's vast presence. 

Here and Now

by Dean Solon

none of us has control over the world.
what is included on the earth-plane, where we are, is free will.
it is up to each one of us to be coming to his or her senses.

what each of us is capable of, and is to be working on and playing with, is an integrating of peace and passion.

this is a time of richness, of richness for each and all of us.
this is a time, and place, that is rich for practice.
there is so much to be working with, here and now.

don't be pushing away this world of activity and phenomena,
and don't be swallowing it whole.
be open to be allowing yourself to be encountering and engaging with these interesting times.
be with attention and intention to be living with clarity and with loving kindness.

this is not a time to be shutting down.
this is a time to be opening to all that is
with mindfulness and heartfulness.
this is a time to be awakening
and awake.

may peace be with you.

Finding Balance during the Holiday Season

 by Brittiney George

How is it possible that the holiday season can feel both energetically exhausting and exhilarating?  Both joyful and stressful?  Feel simultaneously warm and cold?  Maybe it is because the holidays ask us to do two extremely different things: (1) tap into our childhood and see the world through the eyes of a child again, and (2) continue to act like and make decisions of an adult.  This experience can shine light on parts of our lives currently – and within our childhoods – that felt extreme (good or bad).  We become consciously aware of our current life and often compare it to the life we thought we would be living or should be living right now.  In that moment our subconscious belief systems can get kicked back into high alert.  Some familiar phrases that might resurface: 

·      Get Control of Yourself

·      Get it Together

·      Keep it Together

·      Shut that Down

·      Let it go

All of these phrases indicate that something is out of balance and we are trying to figure out a way to respond to feel safe or fit in to our given environment.  There is an energetic release or movement that needs to happen to reset the scale back to even.  During different times in our life, the way we did that may have differed:

·      Tantrums:  The ultimate energy buster in a world that feels out of control, proportion, or too much (too fast, too loud, to unpredictable).  Tantrums allowed us to naturally get the extra energy/noise off our system:  If I am expected to take it all in, than I also need permission to let it all out.

·      Rebellion:  When we learned that tantrums were no longer acceptable by society or in our family, rebellion kicked in.  We still needed an energetic release, but the form of it changed.  It may have been quiet rebellion, or loud in your face rebellion, but either way it was our way of trying to gain back some control, let out some steam, or have our voice heard.  We got the message that we needed to keep it together but were still missing the staples, tape, and glue (aka support or internal resources) necessary to do that.

·      Peace:  Peace is the place where tantrums & rebellion meet and become friends.  Instead of fighting about whether we should or shouldn’t feel how we do, instead of second guessing why we feel that way when those around us don’t, it becomes knowledge.  Tantrum and Rebellion both may still be there, but they are not at war, they are sharing their knowledge about why it is upsetting, what it is throwing us off balance.  It becomes insight and space to acknowledge what we need.  In the acknowledgement of that information….even if you don’t know what to do with it…the energy can flow more easily, emotions can flow more naturally.  You are not getting shut down, tuned out, or broken into pieces by it all.  Now you have choices.  Now you can move.

So this holiday season I wish you acceptance of all of who you are so that your system can truly know balance and find its true peace:

“Peace.  It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble,

Or hard work.  It means to be in the midst of those things and still

Be calm in your heart.”-unknown

Brittiney George is a Movement Practitioner offering Rubenfeld Synergy, Infant Massage Education, and gentle, exploratory movement classes at The Resiliency Center. She co-leads Connection, Expression and Movement (CEM), a monthly workshop series focusing on body-mind integration. To learn more about her practice and services, contact her at 610-389-7866 or movebackintolife@gmail.com

Wishes for a peaceful and picture­-imperfect holiday

by Jen Perry

Ahhh, the holidays and its food, family, and friends. A beautifully laid out table, happy children, civil and perhaps even engaging conversation. We all have a perfect Hallmark­worthy picture of it floating around inside our mind. Can you conjure up yours? I know I have one: my great aunt’s lovely antique china, candlelight, gracious conversation about all that we are thankful for. 

The challenge with our idealized images is that reality often just can’t live up to them. Our human minds make it truly impossible. Whether gleaned from hazy memories of yesteryear or from yearnings in our hearts for just how it could be, these are fantasies. You see, if we have ideas about the perfect day or perfect dinner (or perfect partner, or perfect parent, child, job, or . . . really the applications are endless), then our minds act like a scanner constantly searching the situation for things that need to be fixed, done, changed, or otherwise wrestled into the idealized image. It’s exhausting. Out of the myriad of details before us, it takes just one to “ruin it.” One child’s temper tantrum, one sharp word from a loved one, one burnt pie ~ you get the picture. And THAT is actually where the freedom lies. 

Try this: take your most precious, perfect picture and allow life to happen to it. You may find the results difficult or you may find them hilarious. In my case, that antique table I mentioned? Well, it literally collapsed mid-meal this Thanksgiving with no warning. 

The carefully prepared meal, well maintained china, flowers and candlelight, glasses of wine and cider, and all the silverware came crashing to the floor. A child howling, guests staring in disbelief, and one alert responder racing around as if the torn photo could be repaired. 

2015 is now a year for the history books in my family. Fortunately, we can laugh about this one. 

One of my favorite sayings is: “Peace: It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble, or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart.” I encourage you to take your picture perfect image and your idealism and let life, or gravity, have its way with it. Holding onto our perfectionism, scanning life, real life, for all the ways in which it doesn’t measure up, is not a peaceful or present way to live. These perfect pictures we hold up – of a holiday, a spouse, the future, a child, even our very selves – they block us from seeing the real moments and people before us as they are in all their imperfect splendor. The relief after the surprise of it all falling apart is pure, pure magic. And a gift: the gift of a broken table, a broken picture of perfection is a gift of presence and peace with what is. 

Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC is a licensed professional counselor and peaceful parenting coach. She teaches mindfulness and self­-compassion to people wanting more peace and calm in their hearts. Her next 6 week class offering, Beginner’s Mindfulness, starts January 11, 2016. Space is limited to 6 so reserve your spot today by calling 215­-292­-5056 or emailing jenperry7@mac.com.

World Metta Peace by Dean Solon

wake up, wake up,
look up,
light shining outside the window,
light shining in your mind.
light ever surprising,
a new day dawning,
a new moment singing.

sitting...with brilliant gleaming sunlight shining in the inner landscape of your mind, the mindscape.

sitting...with bright, colorful, beautiful sunflowers, brilliantly gleaming in the inner landscape, of your mind's eye.

sitting...with a golden Buddha resting in the center of your heart, brilliantly shining in the chakra of your heart, your precious, sacred, beating heart.

sitting...with love, and peace, and compassion, lotus-flowering in the heart-chakra, arising and unfolding, blooming and blossoming, in your heart.  lotus-flowering, arising and unfolding, blooming and blossoming...and radiating outwards, from the heart, to all other sentient beings, with brilliant gleaming sunlight shining in the inner landscapes of their minds;  with bright colorful beautiful sunflowers brilliantly gleaming in the inner landscapes of their minds' eyes;  with golden Buddhas resting, brilliantly shining in the chakras of their hearts, their precious sacred beating hearts;  with lotus-flowering, arising and unfolding, blooming and blossoming, in their hearts.

from your lotus-flowering heart, an offering of wishes for happiness, for well-being, for freedom from suffering and safety from harm, for peace and for ease, in the moments of the lives of all beings.

Every Day An Earth Day by Dean Solon

nebulae swirl around my head.
oceans swim around my heart.

bringing attention, lightly, to feeling the sensations of your breathing...allowing your breath to be natural...feeling the sensations of each breath, relaxing into each breath...feeling it through you...the soft sensations of breath coming and going, without effort.
sitting here, sitting now, encountering this present moment...sitting on sacred ground.

one hand on the earth.
you sitting quietly, your body, your physical form and being, on the earth.
sitting quietly, here, now, every day an earth day...every day an earth day.
sitting quietly, one hand on the earth.

nebulae swirl around your head.
oceans swim around your heart.