Moving Through a Debris Field of Feelings

by Brittiney George, BS, MST, ICI, CEIM 

We are all in the middle of a tornado right now.  A pressure front full of conflicting ideas, information, and feelings—lots and lots of feelings.  

Some are picking up pieces of broken foundations; others shattered ideals. For many Hope caught on fire, and dreams may have become heavy and waterlogged.  We each are fighting to ensure that our most precious possessions (to which I might offer include Hope, Joy, Peace, and Curiosity), don’t get torn apart by the rushing rivers of Grief, Fear, Discord, Discomfort, and Worry.

It is a rare moment of time where no home has been left untouched by these storms.  When defenses are low and exhaustion is high, it is easy to lose our grip.  We can quickly get pulled from our own inner knowing into the debris field of feelings surrounding us.  

Times like this encourage us to run or numb from our feelings.  I’d offer a different approach: embrace your feelings.  Not all the feelings that are in the air around you, or on the ground beneath you are yours, so detangling yours from the debris field is important for respite in the storm.

A simple exercise I developed for myself, that many of my clients have also found helpful is name and claiming your emotions.  It is an invitation to detangle from the emotional debris outside and get a clearer sense of how to move with what your feeling on the inside.  Try it out:  

Name, Claim, and Move Emotional Exploration:

1. Start by naming every emotion you feel:  List them like bullet points.  
2. Use I feel vs. I am: listing the emotions as a feeling (I feel angry, sad, elated, relieved…vs. I am angry, I am sad), keeps it as a feeling and not a declaration or judgement of who you are as a person.
3. Name the emotion without the story:  When you don’t get swept away by the story around the emotion (the who, why, how), but instead take a moment to simply name the emotion it is easier to disentangle them.  
4. Move With or Let Move:  The body can feel multiple feelings simultaneously, but not every feeling will be asking for the same movement.  Ex. how anger wants you to move may be very different than grief.  When we are trying to move with all of them at the same time we can get stuck, frozen, or anxious because no move feels “right”.  When you name them, each emotion is validated.  For some feelings that is enough for them to move through on their own.  Then you can pick one to spend time with (maybe it is the loudest, the quietest, or the one that takes up the most space).  
5. Ask that emotion:
• what it wants
• what it needs
• and knowing both and everything else your navigating, what is the movement that is available. (This is where the body is a superstar.  There is always a move available, but it is not always the one we think.  Listening to one emotion at a time, helps that to be clearer).  

The more you practice, the easier it becomes to move with strong emotions, hear the quiet emotions asking to be nourished, and to clear the debris field so movement and connection once again feels possible.

Brittiney George, BS, MST, ICI, CEIM, is a Master Somatic Therapist, Trainer and Movement Practitioner specializing in Transformative Touch.  She is also the creator of the online comic www.thisweekwithjoy.com.  Her areas of specialty include working with highly sensitive persons (HSP’s), and helping people find movement when they feel stuck in life’s transitions.  Contact Brittiney at 610-389-7866 or movebackintolife@gmail.com.  

Catching your breath

by Brittiney George

“If I could just catch my breath.”

 “Give me a moment to catch my breath.”

“I don’t have time to catch my breath.”  

Powerful statements.  Why…because they say something about the “state” we are in:

Winded.

Out of air. 

On the run.

Reaching for oxygen. 

Even the word “catching” is valuable information.  It implies our breath is no longer ours.  We don’t have ownership of it.  We have to find it, chase it, hunt it down, and hold on to it so it doesn’t get away from us again.  For many of us, our daily rhythm involves chasing the clock, catching our breath, crashing, trying to get back up, and then we repeat the cycle all over again.  Is it any wonder then why we walk around with tight shoulders, clenched jaws, tense necks, and shallow, short breaths?  We get caught up in life, and life gets caught up in our bodies.  So, as you fly (or run) into this holiday season, I invite you to remember an important safety message that the airlines share before every flight…… put your oxygen mask on before assisting others and if that doesn’t feel even possible, I hope this resource list below will help to begin you on your journey towards rest, recovery, and a few gloriously full breaths.

Books:

·      The Miracle Morning by Hall Elrod

·      I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t): Making the Journey from “What Will People Think?” to “I Am Enough” by Brene Brown

·      The Forgotten Body by Elisa Cobb

Creativity and Art:

·      Mandalas of The World: A Meditating and Painting Guide

·      How to Make a Finger Labyrinth (that’s also a piece of art)

·      Zentagles (Creative Drawing for Relaxation, Inspiration, & Fun) 

Guided Meditations:

·      Affectionate Breathing by Kristin Neff

·      5 Min. Self-Compassion Break by Kristin Neff

 

Journaling:

·      Writing Down Your Soul: How to Activate & Listen to the Extraordinary Voice Within by Janet Conner

·      Self-Compassion Journal Exercise by Kristin Neff

Movement:

·      5 min. Recharge Routine at HoldenQiGong.com

·      Bringing Up Energy Down (toe tapping) on YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2nl6RAIggw

·      Take 5 Breathing: A Breathing Exercise for Kids (and adults) on YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sh79w9pn9Cg&feature=share

Music:

·      Beautiful by Mali Music at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmKBWWbi6yI

·      A Better Place-Playing for Change at https://www.youtube.com/watch/?v=ZVHOqrw3Jks

·      Unpack Your Heart by Phillip Phillips at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=myHWD6Pch8U&feature=share

·      We Found Love by Lindsey Stirling at https://www.youtube.com/watch/?v=ZVHOqrw3Jks

Videos:

·      Dove Real Beauty Sketches:  You’re more beautiful than you think at  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=litXW91UauE

·      What is an Emotion by Paul Ekman at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaZDLOAg_Po

·      The Gift of Slowing Down by Carl Honore at https://www.ted.com/talks/carl_honore_praises_slowness

Brittiney George, BS, CST-L3, ICI, CEIM, is a Movement Practitioner and Somatic Therapist specializing in Transformative Touch.  She is also a faculty member and trainer for The Somatic Therapy Center.  Her areas of specialty include working with highly sensitive woman, and helping people find their ground when they feel thrown by life.  For a free 55 min. introductory Somatic Therapy session contact Brittiney at 610-389-7866 or movebackintolife@gmail.com.

 

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When Life Throws You a Curveball

by Karen Steinbrecher

We know where we are going and what we want to do.  Then due to forces outside of our control, things don't go as we had planned and life changes – sometimes in the blink of an eye.

After helping my husband heal following a major back operation, I was feeling lighter, breathing deeply in gratitude. Then I found myself facing my own personal health crisis. And the fear returned.

My long-time QiGong practice supported me in that moment, inviting me to take a deep breath and open my mind to a new opportunity – with the knowledge that curve balls are a way of keeping us awake. Sometimes curveballs are even a gift.

Breathing in gratitude in the face of life’s curveballs is not always easy to do! This morning, as thoughts rushed through my mind and my body filled with anxiety, I returned – as I do each day – to the gentle flowing movements of QiGong. And as I began to move, flow, and stretch my body with the many movements that I practice and lead, I began to feel better.

QiGong provides us with an opportunity to release any energy that gets blocked and can stagnate in response to the stressors of life. The flowing movements send a signal to our brain, the body's repair and maintenance manager, to rebuild our joints, muscles, and tendons. QiGong exercises body, mind, and spirit and helps support an internal alchemy of balance and integration, creating our own personal medicine.

Karen Steinbrecher teaches QiGong classes at The Resiliency Center on Tuesdays at 2:30 pm and Thursdays at 6:20 pm. Cost is $10. To RSVP, contact Karen at Karensteinbrecher@msn.com  or 215-836-7184.

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Meaningful Movement with Others through Self-Awareness

by Brittiney George

“Taking responsibility for your physiological state is not only about learning how to down-regulate your system, but it is about communicating your state to those around you…mammals evolved to co-regulate – meaning that we help each other regulate our states through care-giving and reciprocity.”* So how does Self-Awareness impact regulation and relationships? 

A strong sense of self allows you to be in RELATION with others instead of REACTION to others.

Your body knows safety and danger and is constantly reacting to the cues received regarding it.  “Your body can sense something and react to it without it necessarily entering your conscious awareness.  In fact, your vagus nerve has two branches- an older branch that can be recruited for defense by going to the organs below the diaphragm and eliciting immobilization behaviors… and also another newer more evolved branch that, when functioning, keeps “fight/flight/freeze” in check, and supports your health, growth, and restoration.  This branch is the part of your autonomic nervous system that is responsible for allowing you to connect, self-soothe, be playful, and be in relationship.”*

When you tune in to the physical and emotional responses in your body you get to know how you can move with them and learn from them, instead of merely reacting to them.  When you acknowledge, give voice to, and share these experiences in relationship with another, it helps to regulate your system, and create more meaningful movement with your partner or friend.

What are some tools to help with regulation?

Change Your Breathing Pattern:  “Have you noticed when you are upset with your partner, you begin to huff and puff? This is your body physically preparing to mobilize for a fight or to run…in an effort to slow down, you need long exhalations. Try extending your exhalations through intentional breathing or through singing. Singing is wonderful because it uses muscles of the social engagement system.”*

Honor Your Story by Choosing Who and What you Share:  Honor when your gut is telling you, this isn’t someone I want to share my story with.  If you find that difficult, try out some of the empowering statements below:

·      Being authentic does not mean that everyone has the rights to all of me.

·      I can choose who knows the details of my life.

·      I can choose what I share and who I share it with.

·      I choose to honor all of my emotions, even the ones that are hard for me.

·      When I feel vulnerable, overwhelmed, or scared, I can choose to share my experience with someone that will receive my story with respect…..not agreement, not to hold the weight for me, not to take the pain away from me, but to respect the impact that what I’m sharing has on me.

Learn to Listen to the Cues of Your Body:  not sure how to even start listening to your body?  Or maybe you hear your body all the time (pain, anxiety, fatigue), but don’t know what to do with the information.  Somatic Therapy is a wonderful tool to help.  For a complimentary 55 min. Somatic Therapy session contact Brittiney George, at 610-389-7866 or movebackintolife@gmail.com.

*The quotes in this article are from Dr. Stephen W. Porges, creator of The Polyvagal Theory, and a distinguished university scientist at the Kinsey Institute and a Research Professor in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of North Carolina.  Information from this article is available at:  http://www.neilsattin.com/blog/2016/04/34-the-science-of-safety-with-stephen-porges/

Brittiney George, BS, CRS, CST-L3, ICI, CEIM, is a Somatic Therapist specializing in Transformative Touch.  She offers Somatic Therapy sessions, Infant Massage and Baby Sign Language workshops, and exploratory movement classes at The Resiliency Center.  She also co-leads Connection, Expression and Movement (CEM), a monthly workshop series focusing on body-mind integration.  For a complimentary 55 min. Somatic Therapy session contact Brittiney at 610-389-7866 or movebackintolife@gmail.com.

The Power of Authentic Presence: Why Community Matters

by Elizabeth Venart

How did the rose ever open its heart and give to this world all its Beauty?

It felt the encouragement of light against its Being;

Otherwise, we all remain too frightened.

- It Felt Love – from The Gift: Translations of Hafiz by Daniel Ladinksy

Authentic connection – to ourselves and each other – is at the heart of resilience. From the first moment I imagined creating The Resiliency Center, community was always at the forefront of my mind. We are stronger together than any of us could be alone, and we crave opportunities to connect and feel understood, soft landing places during life’s difficult times and strong foundations for our risk-taking and growth.

Isolation can breed loneliness and depression, and wearing a mask in the company of others can be as isolating as sitting home alone. When we do not have places where we can show the myriad colors and sounds of our true self, we may fail to see the universality in our struggles. When we do not have places where we can show up authentically – and be accepted for who we are – then we can feel alone, isolated, and unhappy. We long to be seen and to connect. The growing addiction to social media actually reflects this need, yet it often fails to meet the need it highlights.

In a world increasingly oriented around virtual connection, some people feel more courageous in sharing their thoughts, ideas, experiences, and beliefs – and others feel shut out of the conversation or shut down in the midst of trying to engage. Behind a keyboard, we may feel brave to express some facet of our identities, but how fully are we able to share the vast range of our experiences as human beings?  And, if we are only sharing a small piece of our full experience through social media and yet social media has become a primary way in which people do connect with each other these days, how connected do we really feel?

There is a power in connecting with others face-to-face, in seeing and being seen, in sharing and listening and learning together. The Resiliency Center offers many opportunities to do just that - from meditation twice weekly to movement classes, spiritual poetry gatherings, groups for teens and new moms, and a monthly mindful knitting circle.  We look forward to seeing you - and connecting - soon.  

Importance of Face-to-Face Connection in the Digital Age

by Brittiney George

I have spent a number of years “soul-searching”. Searching for the things that resonated with my soul to let me know that I was in the right place or doing the right thing. I was lucky to find my way into my life’s work as a Somatic Therapist.  As I have embraced soul-filled living, I find that connecting face to face, heart to heart, and soul to soul with others is a crucial part of my self-care.  It's a connection that social media does not provide for me. I hear this same sentiment often from my clients. They share the loneliness, and pain of comparison that happens when the largest part of their support comes from online connections, often feeling like they just don’t measure up to others…..and so I got curious.  What exactly is present, and what is missing, when we connect online vs. in person.  Here’s some interesting research on just that topic:

“Researchers from Beijing Normal University pointed out that face-to-face communication differs from other forms of communication in two key ways:

1.     Face-to-face communication involves the integration of “multimodal sensory information,” such as nonverbal cues (facial expressions, gestures, postures, etc.)

2.     Face-to-face communication involves more continuous turn-taking behaviors between partners, which has been shown to play a pivotal role in social interactions and reflects the level of involvement of a person in the communication”- The Journal of Neuroscience, 7 November 2012, 32(45): 16064-16069

Below is a summary of what Dr. Mercola discovered when he looked at connection:

·      In-Person Meetings Allow Your Brain to Synchronize with Others: 

Research shows a significant increase in the neural synchronization between the brains of two partners during face-to-face interactions that are not present in during other types of, conversation.^- The Journal of Neuroscience, 7 November 2012, 32(45): 16064-16069

·      The Unconscious Elements of Face-to-Face Meetings May Trump Even Language:

Researchers from MIT’s Human Dynamics Laboratory revealed that face-to-face meetings allow members to come up with more ideas and become more capable as a group compared to even virtual meetings. “Who’s talking, how much, in what tone, interrupting or not, facing toward whom and away from whom, and gesturing turns out to matter.”- Newsweek September 24, 2015

·      Face-to-Face Meetings Are Best for Creativity:

Research published in the International Journal of Organizational Design and Engineering found:  “The more team members directly interact with each other face-to-face, and the more they trust other team members, the more creative and of higher quality the result of their teamwork is.” Int. J. of Organizational Design and Engineering 01/2012; 2(4):380 - 401.

·      In-Person Interactions Are Important in Your Personal Life, Too:

Loneliness, a feeling of being disconnected from those around you and wishing you had that connection, is on the rise and can put your health – both physical and emotional – at risk. “It is often difficult, if not impossible, on social media to reveal the qualities that define deep, intimate relationships. While our social media friends offer us a great deal, it is not a true substitute or even supplement for real-life interactions with others. But unlike online friendships, real-life relationships take time and effort. They help us learn about others and ultimately ourselves. Online friendships, while valuable in many ways, lack the ability to provide us with opportunities for deep and lasting emotional closeness. So accept and seek out your online friends, rekindle lost connections, and revisit childhood friendships, as long as it is not at the expense of nurturing and deepening your real-life relationships.” https://psychcentral.com/lib/social-medias-impact-on-relationships/

What kind of connection do you crave right now?  Not all connections are equal.  Where in your life do you need to make a REALconnection…..face to face, heart to heart, soul to soul?  Take a moment and ask yourself that question and trust the gut response that says “this is the one I most need right now”.  Maybe we have something already in place that can help you on the journey to making the connection you are searching for: 

Connecting Soul to Soul:

• Rumi and Hafiz Poetry Evenings
• Morning and Evening Meditation 

Connecting Through Nature: 

·      For the Fun of It! Weekend exploration. (See Details in Featured Programs Below)

·      Explore with the natural world and take a walk in nature on the Fort Washington State Park path easily accessible from our parking lot.

Connecting Through Creativity:

·      Knitting Circle 

·      Philadelphia Writers Workshop 

·      Paint, Sip, and Savor (See Details in Featured Programs Below)

Connecting With Other Parents:

·      Holistic Parents Meetup 

·      Supporting Moms Through Motherhood: Contact Catherine McLaughlin for details at catherine@cjmcounseling.com

·      Infant Massage and Baby Sign Language Classes: Contact Brittiney George for details at movebackintolife@gmail.com

Connecting With Other Holistic Professionals:

·      Monthly Networking Breakfast [Link to: https://www.meetup.com/phillyhealers/]

·      Clinical Supervision Opportunities 

·      EMDR Consultation Group for Therapists: Contact Elizabeth Venart for details at elizabeth@elizabethvenart.com 

·       Mindful Therapist Peer Group: contact Jen Perry for Details at jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com

·      EMDR International Association Regional Meeting:  contact Elizabeth Venart for details at elizabeth@elizabethvenart.com.

·      Looking for a Heart Centered Community To Build Your Practice? Consider joining the team of practitioners with their practices at The Resiliency Center. Contact Elizabeth at elizabeth@theresiliencycenter.com to learn more. 

Connecting Through Mind, Body, and Movement:

·      Qi Gong Classes

·      Rest, Restore, and Move Class

·      CEM (Connection, Expression, and Movement) Workshops 

·      Interstitial Cystitis/Pelvic Pain Support Group: Contact Kathy Krol for details at kasiakrol17@verizon.net

·       Beginner’s Mindfulness Class: Contact Jen Perry for Details-jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com

·       Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Group for Women:  Contact Jen Perry for Details-jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com

Connecting with Other Highly Sensitive People (HSP’s):

Highly Sensitive Leadership: Community Circle: Contact Elizabeth at elizabeth@elizabethvenart.com to learn more. 

Connecting One on One:

Looking for one on one support?  Visit our Practitioner Profile page at http://theresiliencycenter.com/practitioners/.  We’d love to connect with you!

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Brittiney George, BS, CRS, CST-L3, ICI, CEIM, is a Movement Practitioner and Somatic Therapist specializing in Transformative Touch.  She offers gentle, exploratory movement classes at The Resiliency Center and co-leads Connection, Expression and Movement (CEM), a monthly workshop series focusing on body-mind integration.  For a complimentary 55 min. Somatic Therapy session contact Brittiney at 610-389-7866 or movebackintolife@gmail.com.