Signature Strengths - Building on Strengths to Increase Happiness

by Lindsay Roznowski

The final happiness practice I will share is called Signature Strengths. No two people are the same, and their strengths differ. Whereas sometimes we may be focused on areas where we feel we need to improve, Positive Psychology experts encourage us to lean in more fully to the areas where we are already strong — and build upon it, perhaps infusing some play, creativity, and innovation. New habits can be difficult to start, but simply choosing one of these practices to try on a consistent basis could be a profound investment in one’s own happiness and peace. Difficult life events like the pandemic can put things in perspective for all of us, and my hope is that we are all learning, one practice at a time, how to finally put our oxygen masks on first.

Instructions: Identify your top 3-5 signature strengths from the below list. For a week, choose one of your signature strengths daily and try to use it in a new way.

24 Signature Strengths Examples (Peterson & Seligman)

Appreciation of Beauty – Appreciating beauty or excellence in various domains of life 

Spirituality – Drawing strength from a higher purpose, or greater meaning in life

Gratitude – Being aware of, and thankful for, the good things that happen around us

Hope—Expecting the best to happen in the future, and working to attain it

Humor—finding joy in laughter, and bringing such joy to others 

Forgiveness – being able to forgive others, and grant second chances 

Humility and Modesty – allowing one’s accomplishments to speak for themselves

Prudence – not taking unnecessary risks; not doing things that might later be regretted 

Self-Regulation – regulating what one feels and does; being able to manage and control one’s emotions 

Citizenship – working well as a member of a group or team 

Fairness – treating others equally well 

Leadership – helping others reach greater heights 

Love – valuing close relationships with others  

Kindness – doing good deeds and favors for others 

Social Intelligence – having awareness of others’ feelings and internal processes 

Bravery – not shrinking from threat or challenges 

Persistence – finishing what one starts; not giving up easily 

Integrity – valuing genuineness; taking responsibility for one’s feelings and actions 

Vitality – approaching life with excitement and energy 

Creativity – thinking of novel ways to do things

Curiosity – being interested in experience for its own sake

Open-Mindedness – examining things from all sides

Love of Learning – mastering new skills, topics, bodies of knowledge 

Perspective – providing wise counsel to others

 

The Beauty of You: A Love Note from Your Body

by Brittiney George

 

You are a beautiful imperfection.

I know that makes you uncomfortable, because you want to be perfect.

Ahh...my child.  I do not work in perfection.

 

Perfection assumes completion.  But how can you be complete when the world around you, and in you, is full of so many glorious options for miraculous change?

 

I work in magical mysteries, in awe-inspiring moments of truth and clarity.

I commend you for wanting to better yourself.  But I ask you to try not to perfect yourself.

That implies you are flawed.

You are not flawed.

 

You are a colorful mosaic reflecting the experiences of your life.

Instead of berating yourself for all that you do not know;

Breathe. Listen. Explore with me.

 

You are more than a number on a scale, a title in a job, the pain or fear that you feel.

 

You are a gift.

If you don’t believe me, journey with me.

Let me show you how amazing and resilient you truly are.

 

Brittiney George, BS, CST-PRO, ICI, CEIM, is a Movement Practitioner and Somatic Therapist specializing in Transformative Touch and is a faculty trainer and mentor for The Somatic Therapy Center.  She is also the creator of the comic www.thisweekwithjoy.com.  Her areas of specialty include working with highly sensitive persons (HSP’s), and helping people feel unstuck when they feel bogged down by life.  For information contact Brittiney at 610-389-7866 or movebackintolife@gmail.com. 

 

The Benevolence of Beauty

by Elizabeth Venart

 

The wonder of the Beautiful is its ability to surprise us. With swift, sheer grace, it is like a divine breath that blows the heart open. – John O’Donohue in Divine Beauty: The Invisible Embrace

 

When the world of man closed its doors in March last year, the natural world invited us outside to connect and play. Through gardening and time spent in local parks and our own backyard, we found in nature a natural balm to the weariness of an intense and fear-filled time. Nature can be a welcome antidote to stress and boredom. It provides an alternative to the rowing machines and well-worn tracks of the gym. It can also offer us something that stretches far beyond simple diversion or exercise. A walk in nature can be an immersive experience, calming our nervous system and shifting our perspective.

 

When we allow ourselves to inhabit fully the landscape of the present moment, we can delight in the magic of the changing seasons, marvel at the miracle of flowers rising through asphalt, and consider with humility our place among the living things on this planet. Our world as people may have ground to a halt in many ways, but the rest of the natural world continued. I watched how the birds outside my kitchen window built nests, as they do each year, fed their babies, plucked worms and seeds from the ground. I delighted in the birdsong each morning, the brilliant colors of fall, the snow bathing tree limbs with pearl luminescence.

 

Life always has its challenges. Beauty is always there when our eyes are ready to experience her. A child’s laugh, a cloud-speckled sky, a mother fox and her five babies, a warm embrace from a friend we haven’t seen in too long.

 

As the wheel of the year continued to move in its circular rhythm through the seasons, my fond anticipation of the daily walk only strengthened. “I wonder how that cherry tree will look today. . . Will the rhododendron bushes have loosened their tight buds and exploded into pink today?” Bringing a sense of wonder to my daily walks (or wanders when I had more time) imbued my days with delight.

 

The newsletter this month – and our social media – will focus on Beauty. I will be sharing photographs taken during my daily walks over the past year. You will see what my eyes saw, as I walked through my neighborhood delighting in the unfolding beauty of each season.  These images are moments that captured my attention, fascinated and moved me. While some are blossoms and a glimpse of a flower at the peak of its brilliance, others include transition points between the seasons, moments of awe, and the beauty of growth and decay intermingled.

 

As John O’Donohue so beautifully expresses in Divine Beauty: The Invisible Embrace:

 

The graced eye can glimpse beauty anywhere, for beauty does not reserve itself for special elite moments or instances; it does not wait for perfection but is present already secretly in everything. When we beautify our gaze, the grace of hidden beauty becomes our joy and our sanctuary.

 

My wish for each of you is the eye to “glimpse beauty anywhere” and to savor and delight in this experience.

 

Elizabeth Venart is the Founder and the Director of The Resiliency Center and a Licensed Professional Counselor whose practice focuses on supporting Highly Sensitive Persons, therapists (through counseling and consultation), and creative and intuitive people seeking more magic in their lives. She leads a weekly laughter yoga class and hosts a monthly Rumi and Friends Spiritual Poetry Evening to which all are welcome. To learn more, visit her website.

 

Catching your breath

by Brittiney George

“If I could just catch my breath.”

 “Give me a moment to catch my breath.”

“I don’t have time to catch my breath.”  

Powerful statements.  Why…because they say something about the “state” we are in:

Winded.

Out of air. 

On the run.

Reaching for oxygen. 

Even the word “catching” is valuable information.  It implies our breath is no longer ours.  We don’t have ownership of it.  We have to find it, chase it, hunt it down, and hold on to it so it doesn’t get away from us again.  For many of us, our daily rhythm involves chasing the clock, catching our breath, crashing, trying to get back up, and then we repeat the cycle all over again.  Is it any wonder then why we walk around with tight shoulders, clenched jaws, tense necks, and shallow, short breaths?  We get caught up in life, and life gets caught up in our bodies.  So, as you fly (or run) into this holiday season, I invite you to remember an important safety message that the airlines share before every flight…… put your oxygen mask on before assisting others and if that doesn’t feel even possible, I hope this resource list below will help to begin you on your journey towards rest, recovery, and a few gloriously full breaths.

Books:

·      The Miracle Morning by Hall Elrod

·      I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t): Making the Journey from “What Will People Think?” to “I Am Enough” by Brene Brown

·      The Forgotten Body by Elisa Cobb

Creativity and Art:

·      Mandalas of The World: A Meditating and Painting Guide

·      How to Make a Finger Labyrinth (that’s also a piece of art)

·      Zentagles (Creative Drawing for Relaxation, Inspiration, & Fun) 

Guided Meditations:

·      Affectionate Breathing by Kristin Neff

·      5 Min. Self-Compassion Break by Kristin Neff

 

Journaling:

·      Writing Down Your Soul: How to Activate & Listen to the Extraordinary Voice Within by Janet Conner

·      Self-Compassion Journal Exercise by Kristin Neff

Movement:

·      5 min. Recharge Routine at HoldenQiGong.com

·      Bringing Up Energy Down (toe tapping) on YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2nl6RAIggw

·      Take 5 Breathing: A Breathing Exercise for Kids (and adults) on YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sh79w9pn9Cg&feature=share

Music:

·      Beautiful by Mali Music at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmKBWWbi6yI

·      A Better Place-Playing for Change at https://www.youtube.com/watch/?v=ZVHOqrw3Jks

·      Unpack Your Heart by Phillip Phillips at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=myHWD6Pch8U&feature=share

·      We Found Love by Lindsey Stirling at https://www.youtube.com/watch/?v=ZVHOqrw3Jks

Videos:

·      Dove Real Beauty Sketches:  You’re more beautiful than you think at  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=litXW91UauE

·      What is an Emotion by Paul Ekman at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaZDLOAg_Po

·      The Gift of Slowing Down by Carl Honore at https://www.ted.com/talks/carl_honore_praises_slowness

Brittiney George, BS, CST-L3, ICI, CEIM, is a Movement Practitioner and Somatic Therapist specializing in Transformative Touch.  She is also a faculty member and trainer for The Somatic Therapy Center.  Her areas of specialty include working with highly sensitive woman, and helping people find their ground when they feel thrown by life.  For a free 55 min. introductory Somatic Therapy session contact Brittiney at 610-389-7866 or movebackintolife@gmail.com.

 

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Tending to the Inner Landscape Seasonal Reflections by: John Muraco

“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.”

-Albert Camus

One true fact: We all deal with the changing seasons differently.  As it stands true with life’s challenges and changes, ups and downs, and ebb and flow, people have very unique and important ways in which they meet the changing of the seasons.  As we leave summer behind and replace the warm weather with cooler and more ‘biting air’, I become fascinated with the approaches that each one of us has toward this change.  Perhaps merely reading this article creates some angst for you as we delve more deeply into fall and the beginning of winter.  At the same time, others may be ecstatic knowing that they get to pull the sweater out of the closet and enjoy warming drinks, rich and filling foods, and more time indoors.  I wonder though, how can this become a season of understanding ourselves more deeply?  What things can we integrate into out lives to make the darker and colder seasons more inviting?  By witnessing natural landscape changes outdoors we find many clues to the changing landscape within us.  Perhaps with some noticing and a little motivation for self-care, we can begin to harmonize with the cooler seasonal change, as we say goodbye to the golden light of summer, and go inward.

This is a great time of the year to harvest all that was accomplished in the past five months.  No matter what your experience has been, allow yourself a chance for a deep breath and gratitude for arriving to your life today.  And look back on the accomplishments made. Perhaps for you, summer was fraught with challenge, change, and some discomforts.  Now is a great time to allow yourself some time each day for quiet reflection.  Consider journaling, working with collage, drawing, or whatever you choose.  Proceed without judgment, like nobody’s watching- this is your time.  It could be that your experience during the summer was one with many positive changes, a lot of time outdoors, late nights, and high energy.  Again, reflecting on all that has taken shape in the ‘lively’ months of spring and summer, and reaping the benefits of what life has delivered, can go a long way.  Winter can be your wind down period that allows for restoration.

Just like the falling leaves, our energy too can be downward and inward-moving as we transition into fall and winter.  And as we near Halloween, a holiday ripe with ghosts, goblins, and skeletons, I ponder the possible connection to our inner life.  Let this be a time to honor the letting go or passing of choices that might no longer serve us, or take a closer look at relationships that feel non-sustainable.  Further, give yourself freedom to share gratitude for the ones who have had positive impacts on our lives. 

Perhaps you have heard the Yogi Bajan quote “When you don’t go within, you go without.”  This is a wonderful quote to exemplify the quiet inward drawing effects of the winter season, and the nourishing benefits of withdrawing our senses from the outer world to gaze within. Challenging though it may be, the colder and darker months reflect to us, that in order to be born anew we must go within.  Inner stillness and nonjudgmental self-observation empowers us to become available to new ways of being and maybe even open to the parts of ourselves that remain unseen in our shadow.  Be it in stillness, self-reflection, or support from others, we might find there some reverence and light. By that inner light, we may gaze at the things in life that have held us back, noticing what is working and what isn't, and integrating more of what makes our hearts sing into our lives. 

Here are a couple things you can begin to do right now!!

1. Allow yourself 5 minutes (go for more if you can!) of deep belly breathing.  By placing your hand on your belly, inhale through your nose and exhale through your nose.  This will activate the parasympathetic nervous system and allow the body to relax and restore.  If your mind is wandering (that is normal!) bring your attention back to your breath or the rising of your belly into your hand.

2. Self Expression – This is totally up to you!  Maybe the way you want to express yourself is by cooking a warming soup for yourself or the meaningful people in your life.  If journaling is your thing, (or something that you want to make your thing) allow yourself some free-write sessions where you can release whatever has been on your mind.   What expands you?  What contracts you?  Making art, moving your body, and enjoying your time can be very rewarding at this time of year.

3. Cleaning out closets, pantries, drawers, etc.  It may sound funny, but again, this is a great time of the year to ‘go within’ and the nook and cranny parts of our house can be symbolic of the aspects of ourselves that could use some tending to.  It is possible that by cleaning and clearing unwanted clutter might make some space within your inner world!

Remember, there is no right or wrong way to experience anything.  There is only your way.  Be gentle on yourself, listen to your needs, and move forward in the changing seasons in whatever way feels best to you.  Please stay tuned next month when we delve into some ways to use food as medicine, learn about helpful cold & flu winter remedies and ways to beat the winter blues! 

John Muraco is an art therapist and holistic health counselor at The Resiliency Center located in Flourtown.  For more information about John or to schedule a free consultation please go to heartwellhouse.com or reach him by phone at 315-329-9838.

Awake in the circle

by Elizabeth Venart, Resiliency Center Director

Awake

in this circle of souls unfolding,

I gaze skyward to stars and spirits,

honoring the travelers before me

and those yet to join us

on the journey.

Moving

in embrace of the Beloved,

humming,

like bees

making honey,

becoming the honey.

We are Sweetness itself,

Pouring Love

from every pore.

From this place of Love,

I remember.

A frozen moment,

Sitting.

Silence bringing pain, not ease.

Sisyphus and the boulder, struggling.

Cave of question and regret.

Then,

In that moment,

I knew not love.

I had forgotten.

I sunk, a thud to the ground,

Alone.

Then.

How far from that moment,

Now.

Looking out upon the community of Love unfolding

Before me.

Knowing  –

Resonance in every cell –

This IS my tribe.

I have found my Home.

Yes, there is a me,

with gifts to share, stories I tell –

But I am so much more than a me.

I am so much more when we are a We.

Peace

Healing

Joy

Gifts ripe for picking,

like an orchard of juicy peaches,

Whenever I open my heart

to Love.

When my eyes open

to this moment,

I See the One beside me, within me,

That is me.

When I close my mind and allow

my Inner Vision

to guide me,

I surrender judgment and worry,

laying down old stories

and embracing the new moment,

the ever-unfolding moment

of Now.

Now.

Now there is

Love.

Now there is

Gratitude.

Now I can Emerge

and merge

with All That Is.

Present with What is

and the Beauty

of All

Unfolding.