The Practice of Stillness in a Fast-Paced World

by Carolyn Abele, MS, LPC

The beginning of a new year is often a time to start anew. Something I have recently incorporated into my wellness routine is the meditation practice of Savasana.  Savasana in its most simple definition is called “corpse pose,” as it invites a deep stillness and the profound benefits of rest for the mind and body.  Before I dove into the practice of Savasana, I thought taking a long run was the most beneficial thing I could do for my mental health.  When I first heard about Savasana, I skeptically questioned, “How can laying on the floor have any real benefits?” 

The reported health benefits had me curious. Was I missing something? I decided to check it out. From the outside, it didn’t look like much. Savasana is physically basic — you lay on your back with your arms comfortably at your side. (Am I enticing you yet?) The tricky part is remaining completely still, allowing yourself to fully relax, focus on your breath, and release any tension or thoughts.  This is where the practice of Savasana becomes a true practice of noticing and then stopping the fast-paced living, endless to-do lists, and incessant chatter of narration. It is a practice of mindfulness, specifically learning to take a mindful rest. It shifts us away from a mental focus on figuring out our lives to an opportunity for body and mind to untangle and gently process the physical and mental work of the day.  It allows the nervous system to shift from a state of alertness to one of deep relaxation and restoration.

There are physical and mental benefits of the practice of Savasana, including: 

• Improved Mental Clarity: Helps declutter the mind, creates space for greater focus, clarity, and decision-making.
• Stress Reduction: Calming the nervous system reduces stress and promotes emotional balance
• Improved Sleep: Who doesn’t need this? When the quality of our sleep improves, we wake feeling rested. 
• Physical Recovery: Aids in muscle relaxation, promoting faster recovery after exercise, yoga, workout sessions, and other physical exertion.
• Improved Mind-Body Connection: Savasana promotes a deeper connection to the body and its signals.

In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to overlook the importance of slowing down and resting.  But Savasana reminds us that real, true restoration comes from stillness and relaxation. So, the next time you feel like life is moving too fast and far too many things need to be done, resist the temptation to switch into a higher gear and do more. Instead, find a spot on the floor and try the magic of quiet rest. Take your time in Savasana and enjoy the peace it brings to your mind and body. While it may seem counter-intuitive, the deep rest offered will ultimate support you in conquering that to do list — or give you greater clarity about what you can just let go. 

Carolyn Abele, MS, LPC works with adolescents through adults, offering support to individuals struggling with anxiety, depression, trauma, and self-esteem. She offers mindfulness-based cognitive therapy, EMDR Therapy, family therapy, and parent support around behavioral concerns. Her work integrates practical strategies, humor, mindfulness practices, and trauma-informed approaches to heal pain at the root of current patterns. To connect with Carolyn, please call 215-354-7941 or visit her website at carolynabeletherapy.com.

Spring into Growth

by Therese Daniels, LPC, CNIT (Certified Nature Informed Therapist)

We have been conditioned by society to set new goals in January, the start of a new year. Start fresh, stop doing this, start doing that, get to the gym. While in theory this may seem like a good idea, it goes against our roots, against Mother Nature. Bears hibernate, trees, plants, and vegetables delay growth. Nature rests in the Winter and maybe we should too. 

Spring is the season of planting and growing. Many people lose motivation pretty quickly for those goals they set at the start of January. An article in Time magazine states that as many as 80% of people fail to keep their resolutions by February and only 8% of people stick with them the entire year. But think about how you feel in the Spring. When that first sunny day hits, the temperature is above 55 degrees (which feels hot because our bodies have adapted to the cold) and you want to rip off those socks and break out the flip flops and let your toes breathe and soak up the sunshine! Motivation for goals is more likely to stick at this time of year because that is what is natural. This is when we plant seeds for flowers and food to bloom later in the season. The animals wake up and are rested and energized for new things to come. Colors come back! This is a reason why setting new goals in the Spring vs. the Winter is something to be considered.

Goal setting and comfort zones

As a Certified Nature Informed Therapist, I have been able to encourage people to use the many benefits of nature to help them in goal setting and in getting comfortable with the uncomfortable. Some of the greatest things in life involve a certain level of feeling uneasy. Meeting new people, starting a new job, moving to a different home, exercising, parenting, even love has a level of discomfort. If we ran from all of these things, what would happen? Not much. Growth mindset is a term that has become popular over the past several years. The general meaning of the term is that you thrive on challenge and don’t see failures as a setback, but a way to make shifts to continue to move forward and set new goals. To keep going, to grow. 

Last Spring, I was working with someone who had pretty severe performance anxiety and he had a big martial arts challenge coming up. We took our sessions to the trails and more importantly, to the creek. There is a swing that hangs under a large bridge that runs over the creek. My client showed a lot of interest in getting to the swing but was afraid to do so. There were steep and muddy hills with tree roots and branches and wet leaves along the way. And once you got down to the water’s edge you still had to enter the water and navigate slippery rocks to get to the middle of the creek where the swing hung. It took some time, but by the summer, he was swinging on that swing and feeling so proud. Each week we got closer and closer, and he felt more and more brave. Throughout our sessions, I was able to use our experience in nature and transfer it to his fear of performing in front of others. He realized he could do things that felt scary and have success. A week after he went swinging, he took his martial arts test and passed with flying colors! 

I believe we can find a balance between allowing ourselves the time to rest and prepare while also believing in ourselves enough to face challenges and to get back up when we fall down. Look to nature to and follow its course. Going back to our roots and what is innately in us and around us can help us spring into growth! 

Therese M. Daniels, MA, LPC, is a Certified Nature-Informed Therapist who has been in the mental health field over 20 years. She provides individual, couples, and family counseling for children, teens, and adults. She offers regular nature walks and creates nature retreats to introduce the power of nature to support healing and wellness. She specializes in supporting people with anxiety, depression, self-esteem struggles, life transitions, and more. 

A year of living with and learning from COVID 19 - by Heather Hill

Do you remember your life a year ago?  What you were doing/planning/dreaming about?  This February, I’m intensely aware that we are approaching the one year anniversary of living with COVID 19.  It’s hard to believe all that has taken place.  2020 and part of 2021 seems like it’s been suspended in time or that time itself has found a wrinkle that we are living.  If someone had told me we would be living this long in various stages of lockdown a year ago, I would have climbed right out of my skin.  Instead, it has been a slow wayward journey of shedding expectations, slowing down, living with uncertainty, cherishing those we love, enjoying nature, getting outdoors, being grateful for what we have, and learning to live with less.  Inspired by a Facebook Post, of all things, I invited the practitioners of the Resiliency Center to reflect on their journey through the year in this newsletter.  Here are the questions for reflection which we invite the reader to reflect on as well: 

 

Questions to consider: 

1. For what are you most grateful as you look back over the year and why? 

2. What did you take for granted this year?   

3. What did this reveal to you about yourself and your presence in the world?   

4. What new hobby or old pastime did you take up or revive during this time? 

5. Was there an unexpected joy that you experienced during this time?  

6. What is the most important thing that the year of Covid 19 has taught you?   

 

We close this newsletter with some of our favorite shows and books that have accompanied us along the way.  Almost every phone call or zoom gathering I have had with friends and family has ended with sharing our favorite stories either in book or digital form.  These stories have made us laugh, inspired us or temporarily transported us away from the angst and stress of living through COVID times.   

 

My Reflections

For what are you most grateful as you look back over the year and why? I’m grateful for my family, friends and health but that is not unusual except that I feel it more palpably and daily.  This year, I’ve also been grateful for my work that allows me to connect with others in a meaningful way and on a deeply human level, to bear witness to the strength and resiliency of the human spirit and to laugh in the midst of struggle and pain.   

 

What did you take for granted this year? This year I learned how much I always take for granted:  opportunities and a sense of safety afforded to me by white privilege, health, food security, choices for education, employment, space- both in my own home and in my neighborhood.   

 

What did this reveal to you about yourself and your presence in the world? This has revealed to me that I have been sleepwalking in some ways.  The struggle and challenges of 2020 have awakened within me an urgency about social, racial, and environmental justice.  This year has revealed to me that my busy-ness can and does rob me of precious energy and clarity needed to devote to working for causes I believe in and spending more time with people I love.  The time to rest, reflect can bring forth a return to the things that truly matter.       

   

What new hobby or old pastime did you take up or revive during this time? I found Yoga with Adrienne on Youtube!  I have never been a regular practitioner of yoga because I’d much rather run, spin or swim...but Adrienne’s delightful personality and less than one hour classes won me over.  I also reconnected with a textile artist friend who has guided me on a journey called “The Art of Weaving a Life” by Susan Barrett Merrill.  I find weaving to be soothing and meditative...and less frustrating to me than knitting! 

   

Was there an unexpected joy that you experienced during this time? One day we dragged our firepit to the end of the driveway and invited our neighbors, who we used to hold at a respectful distance, to join us.  Thus began an unlikely friendship of two families from different political parties during an election year.  We watch over each other, take care of our neighbors who can’t get to the grocery store or shovel their walks, and coordinate a weekly dinner exchange.  Also the birds coming to our new birdfeeder along with the time to slow down and observe them always gives me joy.  It just never gets old seeing a male bright red cardinal in the winter landscape.     

 

What is the most important thing that the year of Covid 19 has taught you? I have always been a restless soul and felt the constant need to get out or see lots of friends.  I’ve resisted quieter pastimes and the rest that is so restorative.  The year of COVID 19 taught me I could adapt and not just survive, but thrive on simple pleasures like baking bread, having patience, finding connection and loving the people right in your own backyard.  I am integrating more of my values into my space and my family’s life.  I learned that small acts of kindness are the surest route to a sense of connection and belonging. 

 

For One Who Is Exhausted, a Blessing

by John O’Donohue

Source: https://onbeing.org/blog/john-odonohue-for-one-who-is-exhausted-a-blessing/

When the rhythm of the heart becomes hectic,

Time takes on the strain until it breaks;
Then all the unattended stress falls in
On the mind like an endless, increasing weight.

The light in the mind becomes dim.
Things you could take in your stride before
Now become laborsome events of will.

Weariness invades your spirit.
Gravity begins falling inside you,
Dragging down every bone.

The tide you never valued has gone out.
And you are marooned on unsure ground.
Something within you has closed down;
And you cannot push yourself back to life.

You have been forced to enter empty time.
The desire that drove you has relinquished.
There is nothing else to do now but rest
And patiently learn to receive the self
You have forsaken in the race of days.

At first your thinking will darken
And sadness take over like listless weather.
The flow of unwept tears will frighten you.

You have traveled too fast over false ground;
Now your soul has come to take you back.

Take refuge in your senses, open up
To all the small miracles you rushed through.

Become inclined to watch the way of rain
When it falls slow and free.

Imitate the habit of twilight,
Taking time to open the well of color
That fostered the brightness of day.

Draw alongside the silence of stone
Until its calmness can claim you.
Be excessively gentle with yourself.

Stay clear of those vexed in spirit.
Learn to linger around someone of ease
Who feels they have all the time in the world.

Gradually, you will return to yourself,
Having learned a new respect for your heart
And the joy that dwells far within slow time.

Slowing Down This Fall ~ Living Life From a Place of Rest

by Jen Perry, LPC

Summer had a spontaneity to it for me this year with lots of kids activities and spur-of-the-moment trips to the lake and beach. This fall, I find myself craving a bit more paced of a schedule and routine. The benefits of rituals and routines are many - including a gentle holding pattern that allows us to live our lives from a place of rest.

Can you imagine what living life from a place of rest might be like? Instead of letting the frantic and frenetic pace of modern life dictate our personal pace in the world ~ living life from a place of rest has three important components: 1) prioritizing the essential basic need of sleep; 2) daily scheduling periods of activity with periods of downtime; as well as 2) cultivating a sense of calm moment to moment. This article will focus on the first component: Sleep.

"Sleep is the golden chain that ties health and our bodies together.” ~ Thomas Dekker

Living life from a place of rest means to emphasize that we rise each morning from rest and will return again in the evening to this restful state. It means to be intentional about our nighttime routines so that we can deepen the level of rest we can achieve. It is knowing how to skillfully meet occasional bouts of insomnia with confidence. Insomnia and sleep problems are often considered effects of stress, depression, and anxiety but new research shows that it can be a considerable contributor to these problems. Here is an article about just that: https://www.theguardian.com/society/2017/sep/06/lack-of-sleep-could-contribute-to-mental-health-problems-researchers-reveal. Being intentional about how we approach this important third of our lives can be preventative as well as help address many mental health challenges.

Sleep “is a pragmatic response to good health. If you have good sleep, it increases your concentration, attention, decision-making, creativity, social skills, health. If you get sleep, it reduces your mood changes, your stress, your levels of anger, your impulsivity, and your tendency to drink and take drugs.” ~ Russell Foster. His Ted Talk can be found here: https://www.ted.com/talks/russell_foster_why_do_we_sleep

There must be some important reason that our bodies require so much rest. For a fascinating dip into the history of humans trying to figure out why and how we sleep here: https://www.howsleepworks.com/how.html I’m struck by the apparent import of sleep: if you live to be 100 you will have spent a cumulative 30 years asleep. I firmly believe in working with our bodies and natural rhythms for health and wellness and given the sheer percentage of time dedicated to sleep from an evolutionary standpoint I think it is worth considering how we approach it nightly.

And yet, many of us (myself included at times) deny or at a minimum rail against this very basic human need for rest. Many of us find we have an inner revolt of sorts towards bedtime, most of us carry an inner child who continues to throw a tantrum at bedtime. This is an invitation to re-parent ourselves and take our inner three year old to bed with intention.

A few suggestions to get a good night’s sleep:

Have a bedtime routine that puts you to sleep on purpose. This does not need to be complicated, just a few simple cues to your body that sleep is coming. Washing your face, brushing teeth, making a gratitude list, doing a guided meditation are all good ideas. Instead of crashing on the couch, send yourself off to bed with the intention for rest.

Lower the temperature in your room. Experts seem to suggest a temperature between 60-67 degrees for adults, 65-70 for kids.

Darken your room. Turn off all lights, electronics, get dark out curtains or a bed tent. (Find a bed tent here: https://www.privacypop.com/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMI76zQzdaa1gIVgiaGCh1Ndg6dEAAYASAAEgIU3PD_BwE. Bed tents are great for kids!

Use a white noise maker such as this one at Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/HemingWeigh-White-Noise-sound-Machine/dp/B01NAPB57J/ref=sr_1_4_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1505048583&sr=8-4&keywords=white+noise

Shut down screens at least an hour before bed

Aim to get at least seven hours of sleep

Go to sleep and wake up at approximately the same time each day. Your body is amazing … if you ask it to stay up beyond bedtime you WILL get a second wind and be able to stay up, albeit at some cost to your health and well-being that accumulates over time. Read more at https://brightside.me/inspiration-health/how-to-fix-all-your-sleep-problems-with-science-302110/

What to do when you can’t sleep. If you have insomnia, the worst thing you can do is freak out. This will push sleep further away. Instead, emphasize to yourself that rest counts for something and sleep studies show that we often get more sleep than we think we do during sleepless nights. Breathing and intentionally relaxing your body, or practicing sleep yoga or yoga nidra can be very helpful. Here is an example of a yoga nidra:  http://www.yoganidranetwork.org/mp3/space-love-compassion. Counseling can help with insomnia and other self-care issues.

Jen Perry is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Mindfulness Meditation Teacher, Peaceful Parenting Educator and Coach. Jen’s approach to her client’s mental health and wellbeing focuses on implementing mindful self-care and self-compassion practices. Jen helps people prioritize what is truly important to them and build a heartful life that they love. In addition to seeing clients individually, Jen works with families and runs a weekly Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Therapy Group. Jen can be reached at jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com or 215-292-5056. Additional blog posts can be found at https://heartfulnessconsulting.com/blog/