Reimagining Resolutions. Letting Go Of Lists.

by Tracie Nichols

Around this time of year, many of us do a year-end review of our lives or our businesses, or both. We look at what we accomplished. What we’re proud of or what we didn’t do so well. Then we go ahead and plan for the next year. We make resolutions or set intentions; create affirmations or to-do lists.

The thing is, we tend to squeeze it all into a few weeks in December and January because this is the traditional turning point in our year, based on the Gregorian calendar.

But, cramming a year-end review and coming year planning process into a few short weeks feels distinctly unwieldy and unnatural. Add in that many of us are also celebrating holidays during those weeks, and the whole experience can tip over into “That’s overwhelming!” territory.

So why do we do it?

If you think about it, part of our urge to review and plan at this time of year likely rises from times when we were more deeply tied to the land. Both through the natural rhythms of seasons and of agricultural rhythms like harvesting, winnowing, and storing seeds for the following year’s planting.

But, and here’s the important part, the process would have been spread over two seasons, not a few short weeks or days.

For example, autumn (late September, October, November) is the natural time for reviewing what we’ve learned and done and for sorting and consolidating what we’ve accumulated during the spring and summer. Like trees dropping leaves and squirrels gathering nuts and seeds we can follow nature’s guidance and drop extraneous ideas, beliefs, or actual stuff and seed (or archive) for later what’s truly useful and nourishing.

Then, during the quieter months of early winter (later December through January and early February) we can look over those stored seeds (ideas, insights) and plan for the coming planting and growing season.

Whether planning actual gardens, creating a career strategy, making a plan for spending more time with family or expanding time spent doing something that relaxes or restores us, doing the actual planning over a few months gives us the time and space to be very intentional about our choices.

We don’t have to make resolutions or lists on January 1^st just because that’s the way things have always been done. Indeed, we don’t need to make resolutions or lists at all.

If we choose to do any reviewing or planning, let’s be infinitely kind to ourselves and spend time throughout the autumn and winter thoughtfully crafting something that fits our lives, aligns with who we are and nourishes us along the way.

Tracie Nichols, M.A. is a holistic business and life coach, aromatherapist and poet. With 10 years experience as a woman business owner, 7 years holistic mentoring/coaching experience, 30 years as an aromatherapist, and a masters degree in human transformation, her work is about standing in solidarity with body-centered and highly sensitive women, walking with them as they discover/rediscover their body-wise, empathetic, intuitive strengths. Supporting them as they bring their whole selves to their life and work. Helping them be accountable to themselves and their dreams of making whatever difference they choose to make. You can reach Tracie at https://tracienichols.com/ or tracie@tracienichols.com. Or connect with her on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tracietnichols/ or Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EcoAudientTracieNichols. 

A Satisfying Ending Needs A Good Beginning

by Tracie Nichols

A few years ago I drove my youngest son to New England to start a dream summer job at a mountain bike park.

My son loves downhill biking. LOVES it. He’d be working with a good friend. They’d found an apartment they could share. He could save money for school and do something he loves all summer long. On paper, this seemed like a charmed opportunity for him.

The trip was a disaster in nearly every way possible.

Esme, my faithful orange car, broke down. When we finally reached his apartment the landlord was unprepared and unavailable, meaning no key and no moving in. This after many text messages confirming our arrival time. At the mountain, his future boss was out sick. He couldn’t check in and get his work schedule or his ride pass so he couldn't be at the mountain that day.

Marooned with no place to be, we stood there at the base of the mountain he'd hoped to be riding all summer, worried and bewildered.

It felt like a truly awful beginning, but it was really a truly awful ending to a journey begun without focused attention from everyone involved. The beginning actually happened weeks before; a tiny trail of haphazard communication among just my son and his friend.

They were communicating through the exhaustion and worry of their finals, the busyness of a sister’s graduation and the chaos of visiting family. Their passion and enthusiasm were driving the bus. Thoughtfulness was half a mile behind, out of breath and losing ground fast. Despite good intentions, this bus had “Yikes!” written all over it.

All of us had divided attention when talking about this opportunity: kids, parents, landlords and employers. As my son and I stood at the bottom of the mountain that day, we both realized we’d had gut feelings of unease we shrugged off because everything looked good on the surface. And, because it seemed like such an exciting, not-to-be-missed opportunity.

What we all learned from our experience is that beginnings have their best chance of becoming satisfying endings when everyone involved commits their full, thoughtful attention to the planning process. If they share gut feelings as they arise, and respectfully call out anyone who isn’t fully participating.

Clear, honest communication is essential at every step. I know that seems obvious, but you’d be surprised how many endeavors are launched driven by passion and enthusiasm without the map of thoughtful, honest communication.

The next time you’re beginning something new, anything from getting a new dog to transitioning out of a corporate job to open your own business, here are a few suggestions for making it a good beginning:

1.     Check in with your intuition and ask if this project is truly viable. If it involves considerable resources and affects the lives of other people, consider verifying your choice with trusted advisors.

2.     Ask yourself what a satisfying journey will look and feel like. How would you like this process to end? Be sure you have a clearly drawn map, and then turn your passion loose to keep you moving.

3.     Enjoy your passion and enthusiasm, and consciously invite your mind and intuition to join the party. (Deep breaths can help navigate over-exuberant enthusiasm.)

4.     Think about who needs to be part of the conversation. Does it feel realistic to ask for their focused attention for this project? If not, is there someone else you can invite?

5.     Pause often and ask yourself if you are fully present. Are mind, enthusiasm and gut all paying attention? How about everyone else?

6.     Enjoy the ride!

Tracie Nichols is a holistic business coach offering coaching that’s comfortably practical with its roots in nature-informed solutions. She helps body-centered practitioners and highly sensitive women build successful businesses guided by the wisdom of their bodies and the natural world. You can learn more or drop her a line at TracieNichols.com.